The Tragedy of Youth
by LilMissLibra
Summary: Let's take some of our favorite countries and put them in a mental hospital AU with tragic back stories. What will happen? Well, angst will ensue, I assure you. Warning: mentions of self harm, eating disorders, depression, incest, angst, etc. ((Slight name change))
1. First Meeting

**Hello everyone, and welcome to my new story. I'm just going to put this first chapter out to see how people like it before I continue.**

**Basically the idea here is that a lot of people like to write their favorite characters as depressed and/or angsty, so what if I wrote all of them as tortured souls?**

**Yes, there will be pain and sadness, but it will hopefully get better (eventually). I am going to focus mainly on this group of four, but I will probably diverge to look at other characters as well. There will be many POV shifts, in order to get a good understanding of what they're all thinking.**

**Warnings: mentions of cutting, incestuous desires, and angsty teenagers.**

**Please remember to leave a review, it would really help me see if anyone likes this idea. Enjoy!**

**Edit: changed the spelling of Norway's name**

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Eiríkur looked around the gray room. He sat in a metal folding chair in a circle of other chairs. _Why am I here?_ he wondered. _I'm not like these other freaks._ But he couldn't decide if he was better than them or worse.

To his right sat a blond boy with periwinkle-colored eyes trying to make himself as small as possible. Next to him sat a scary looking girl with long, silvery blonde hair who glared with cold blue eyes around the circle. Across the circle, separated from the rest of the ground by a few chairs on either side of him, was an Asian boy with layered black hair, cold brown eyes, and a condescending smirk.

"Eiríkur?" said the therapist in charge of the group. "Would you like to begin?"

"No," he said simply. He looked at his hands in his lap.

"Okay," she conceded. At least she wasn't going to force him to speak. "Matthew?" The boy next to him looked up in surprise.

"You remembered me?" he asked timidly. His voice was quiet and meek.

"Of course, I did." Matthew breathed a sigh relief.

"It gets so exhausting, having everyone forget about you.

"My twin brother is the 'golden child' in our family. He gets perfect grades, has a steady job, plays football and baseball. Basically, he's perfect. Well, almost. See, he always manages to piss off a lot of people. Those people always mistake me for him and beat me up. I've tried talking to my parents, but what do they care? I'm the other twin who doesn't get great grades and doesn't have a job. The only things I'm good at are hockey and French, and who cares about that?

"Anyway, one day after practice, these guys were harassing me. I just…snapped. 'I'm not Alfred,' I said. Before I knew it, Al was trying to calm me down, and my hockey stick was covered in blood. I guess I beat up the three guys pretty badly."

Eiríkur shivered at the look on Matthew's face.

"Do you blame your brother?" asked the therapist.

"Oh, no, it's not his fault. I mean, it is his fault he's kind of a douche, but it's not his fault we look alike. He's always been there for me, so no, I don't hold it against him."

"Why don't you tell us more about your relationship with your brother?" The way she said "relationship" made Eiríkur think of Niklas. He gripped his wrist and looked down.

"Well, I guess we're, ah, close," Matthew said hesitantly. "We hang out together a lot, when he's not busy with other things." He thought for a second then added quietly "I don't think he knows how I feel about him."

"How do you feel about him?" Eiríkur tensed up, but at the same time he wanted to laugh. Maybe he did fit in here.

"I like him." Matthew wondered why he was able to say it that easily. He had to admit, it felt good to get everything off his chest. He usually kept things bottled up, which probably added to his…incident.

"Good, Matthew. Let's move on. Natalya?" The frightening girl to Matthew's right looked up and smiled.

"I also like my brother," she said. "It's no secret; I've always wanted to marry him. No one else is good enough for him. I've never hurt anyone, but I guess I scared away one too many potential dates. He sent me here, so he wouldn't have to deal with me anymore." Her voice broke, and Matthew felt sorry for her. He thought of Alfred's face when he had pulverized those jerks.

_"Mattie?" he had said quietly, looking scared. "What's going on?" Matthew didn't remember what he had said, but Alfred had kept his distance ever since._

"Why was your brother the one to send you away?" asked the therapist, interrupting his train of thought.

"My parents died a long time ago, and my older sister abandoned us to live her own life. Ivan has taken care of me for as long as I can remember."

"Very good, Natalya." Natalya wondered what part of her story was very good. She felt tears prick at her eyes and blinked them away. She wouldn't cry in front of these boys.

"Xiao, why don't you go next?" The boy a few chairs to her right scowled at the therapist. The, looking at the silvery blond boy to Matthew's left, he smirked.

"I'm not going until he talks," he said. The boy started, gripping his wrist and keeping his violet eyes downturned.

"Very well. Eiríkur, are you ready to talk?" He looked up to glare back at Xiao, who grinned widely.

"Fine," he said then sighed. "I'm also in love with my brother, Niklas." He paused, and Natalya watched the Asian boy's grin turn back into a scowl. "But he doesn't know. In fact, he has a boyfriend, a big idiot named Magnus. I honestly don't know what Niklas sees in him.

"I know it's sick and wrong, but I really can't help loving him. And I know if I told him, he'd never speak to me again. That makes me so mad and sad that I—" He paused, gripping his wrist tighter. Natalya wondered what it would be like to have to hide her love from Ivan.

"Go ahead and say it," urged the therapist. "You're safe here."

"I cut myself," Eiríkur whispered. "If I don't, I feel like I'm going to burst. It's how I stay so calm all the time, especially when I have to see Niklas with Magnus.

"But one day, Niklas saw my cuts, and he looked so sad. He asked me what was wrong, but I couldn't tell him. I just kept saying it was none of his business, and it was a big mess." He paused to talk a deep breath. "So here I am."

The scary chick and the quiet guy nodded, but Xiao just crossed his arms and scowled some more. He was fed up with this weird group. He had hoped the cute boy across from him would be fairly normal, but that didn't happen.

"Good, Eiríkur, great job," cooed the therapist, and Xiao rolled his eyes. "Xiao?"

"Let me just start by saying I'm not a freak like you guys," he spat. The other three looked shocked, but he continued. "I don't have any weird, incestuous feelings."

"Yes, thank you, Xiao," clipped the therapist, and he smirked. "Why don't you tell us your story?"

"My mother was Chinese, and my father was English. He went back to his 'real family' before he knew I was on the way. My poor mother already had a boy to take care of, and she had to work multiple jobs to make ends meet.

"She died when I was young, and my older brother Yao did his best to raise me. Apparently that wasn't good enough, because about a year ago the government sent me to live with my long lost English half-brother. My father had a heart attack and died a couple years ago, so I guess he got what was coming to him.

"Arthur forced me to speak only English, began to address me as Leon, and wondered why I rebelled against him. I'm here, because he deemed me a problem child. He thinks I'll be fixed into a perfect little white kid."

"Okay, good. And you said Xiao is the name you prefer?"

"It's my _only_ name."

"Okay, well that's all the time we have for today. Good work everyone, and I'll see you tomorrow."


	2. Phone Calls

**AN: Thank you guys for your interest!**

**Warnings: cutting, incestuous feelings, angst**

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Xiao stormed down the hallways, hating the white walls. He reached the telephone for the patients' use and grabbed it. He dialed the only number he knew and waited impatiently as the line rung.

"Hello, who is this?" answered a familiar voice.

"Yao, it's me," he answered in Chinese, feeling immensely relieved already.

"Xiao! How are you doing?" his older brother asked excitedly.

"Not well, I hate it here. When can you get me out?" He heard Yao sigh heavily.

"You know my hands are tied. Arthur has legal custody of you, so he can put you wherever he wants. I'm trying to find a good lawyer, but –"

"No, don't waste your money," Xiao said hurriedly. "You need it for the restaurant." Yao sighed again. He did that a lot, especially when it came to Xiao.

"I should've sent you to school. Then you'd still be living here…"

"Don't worry, Arthur wasn't able to get me to go to school either. That's part of the reason I'm stuck in this fucked up hellhole. Anyways, I would rather help out in the restaurant than try suffering through an English-only school."

"Yes, but that's what got you taken away from me in the first place. You're only 16; you really should be getting an education. How is your English doing?"

"I guess it's gotten better since I went to live with that stuffy bastard. I have to use it here, too." Xiao paused, remembering something. "I met this guy today who speaks French."

"That's interesting. Have you made any friends?"

"Hell, no. These people are all kinds of messed up. I swear, everyone here has a thing for their brother."

"Woah, don't catch that."

"I won't." Xiao heard his brother yell at someone in the background. He sighed, knowing their time was about up.

"I've got to go, Xiao. But please, call me anytime you want to talk."

"I will," he replied. "Get me out of here as soon as you can."

"I will."

They hung up, and Xiao took a deep breath. There was no need to get emotional over a simple phone call with his brother. Sure, they hadn't gotten to speak much in the past 6 months or so since the government stole him away.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a small blonde girl. He turned his head to look at Natalya, and she stared back at him blankly.

"Did you need something?" said a harsh voice, bringing Natalya's thoughts back to the present. She realized she had been staring at that Asian boy's hair for some time now. In fact, she had followed him all the way to the telephone just so she could keep staring at it. This happened a lot when she zoned out.

"No," she said in a voice she hoped was as harsh as his. He rolled his eyes and walked away from the telephone, muttering something about freaks.

She stepped up to the telephone, figuring she might as well call someone. Her fingers dialed a number before she had time to tell them to, and then the line was ringing in her ear.

"Hello?" answered her brother curtly.

"Hello, Ivan," she said as sweetly as possible.

"Natalya, why are you calling me? Is something wrong?" Why did he sound so frightened? Didn't he realize that she would never hurt her dear brother?

"No, nothing's wrong," she replied, twirling a long strand of silvery hair around her finger. "I just called to tell you about my day."

"Oh, okay…"

"I met with a group today. They were all boys around my age. One was really quiet, but he had a lot of pent up anger. One was only angry. One was only quiet." She almost laughed at how poetic it sounded, but she stopped when she couldn't fit herself into the equation.

"Oh, that is nice, little sister. I do not have time for chit-chat right now. I will talk to you later."

"Oh, okay, I'll—" Ivan hung up before she could finish.

_Does he really hate me that much?_ A single tear rolled down her face, and she dropped the phone. It clattered to the floor, making her jump at the noise.

"Jeez, the least you could do is put it away properly." The silvery haired boy from the group session grabbed the phone off the floor and set it on the receiver.

Eiríkur looked at the girl. "Hey, you were in that group thing, weren't you? Natasha?"

"Natalya," she said quietly. Eiríkur noticed something shining on her face. Was that a tear? She seemed too scary to cry.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked. She looked up at him slowly, and her eyes widened when they met his.

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine," she replied gruffly.

"Sibling trouble?"

"Yes…"

"I know how that goes. Sometimes it's like he just doesn't see me."

"Yeah, exactly." They looked at each other for a moment, a feeling of mutual understanding passing between them.

"Um, I guess that's how Matthew feels, too," Eiríkur said, looking away awkwardly.

"Do you want to…hang out, or something?" Natalya asked.

"Um, sure. I'm going to call my brother first."

"Oh, yeah. I guess I'll see you in the lounge when you're done?"

"Yeah." Natalya walked away, leaving Eiríkur alone with the phone.

_Well, I guess I have to call him now._ In reality, he really did want to talk to Niklas, if only to hear his voice. However, he hadn't spoken a word to his brother since…

_He had been so stressed and angry. Magnus was driving him crazy, trying to act like he was his brother. And then he had to see them kissing, and the way Magnus held Niklas…he couldn't take it. He had gone up to his room and slammed the door maybe a little too loudly. But he didn't care; he just needed release._

_ He grabbed his razor blade out of his underwear drawer. He pressed the blade to his wrist and quickly pulled it horizontally. He breathed a sigh of relief, watching beads of blood form on the cut. He was so caught up in the adrenaline rush, he hadn't heard his brother open his door to check on him._

_ "Eirí—Oh, my god," gasped Niklas from the doorway._

_ The blade fell to the floor, and Eiríkur's life crumbled around him in that one moment. He met his brother's eyes for only a second. Then he stared at the ground, refusing to speak._

Eiríkur shuddered at the memory. He couldn't get Niklas's horrified face out of his head. He almost decided not to call, remembering the frantic way his brother had questioned him.

_"Eiríkur? Please talk to me," Niklas said as he cleaned and bandaged Eiríkur's wound. "What is wrong, little brother? I can fix it, just tell me…"_

Niklas's usually cool exterior had folded into a worried mess, and Eiríkur hated himself for that. But he knew he couldn't tell his brother what was wrong, so he had kept silent.

But now he was ready to speak to him. Not to tell him, just to talk about other, mundane things.

He picked up the phone and dialed.

"Hello?" answered a voice that was definitely not his brother's.

"Magnus," Eiríkur said bitterly. "Where is my brother?"

"Oh, hey, Eiríkur! How's it goin', kid?"

"I told you not to call me that. Can I please talk to my brother?"

"Huh? You actually wanna talk to him now? That's a change."

"Shut up, and put Niklas on."

"Okay, fine, let me get him. Jesus…" Eiríkur heard Magnus mumble something to his brother that sounded like "Are you up for this?" Curious, he pressed the phone closer to his ear. There was a shuffling sound that told him the phone was being passed.

"Hello, little brother," came Niklas's voice. He sounded tired.

"Niklas, are you okay?" Eiríkur asked worriedly.

"I'm fine. I'm happy to hear your voice again." Eiríkur blushed. _No, he doesn't mean it like that, you idiot._

"Er, yeah, sorry," he muttered.

"All is forgiven, little brother. Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Eiríkur remained silent. "As I expected." Niklas sighed. "What did you need?"

"I just…wanted to say hi."

"Okay. How are things going there?"

"Okay, I guess. I had a group meeting today with some other people my age."

"Have you made any friends?"

"I think so. I'm going to hang out with this girl from the group after this."

"Oh, that's great, Eiríkur."

They chatted for a few more minutes, then Niklas had to go.

"You're not getting sick, are you?" Eiríkur asked.

"I told you, I'm fine. Just a little tired is all."

They hung up, and Eiríkur didn't feel any better.

"Um, excuse me," Matthew said to the boy from his group. "If you're done, can I use the phone?"

"Huh? Oh, sorry, I didn't see you there," answered the boy, stepping away from the phone.

"It's okay. No one ever does."

Matthew grabbed the phone and dialed Alfred's number. It rang and rang, but no one answered. Finally, the voicemail picked up.

"Hey, you've reached the Hero's phone. Leave a message!" chirped the recording of his brother's voice.

"Al, it's Mattie," Matthew said sadly. _He never misses a call, especially from me._ "Just calling to say hi, I guess. I'm doing fine, and I hope you are, too." He hung up the phone and sighed. _So he's still avoiding me._

"No answer?" Matthew jumped, looking at Eiríkur. He hadn't realized the other boy was still there, watching him. Matthew shook his head in response. "Natalya and I are going to hang out in the lounge, wanna join us?"

"Um, sure," he replied quietly.

He followed the other boy down the hallway to the lounge. There, they found Natalya sitting in front of the TV with her legs spread out in a wide stretch.

"Woah, I didn't know you were that flexible," Eiríkur said, indicating her split-like position.

"There is a lot you don't know about me," she replied quietly. The boys sat on either side of her as she stretched from one leg to the other.

"Are you a gymnast?" Matthew asked.

"I _was_," she replied bitterly. "Not much practicing I can do here."

"Yeah, my hockey skills are going to get really rusty."

"Heh, I guess it's a good thing I don't do anything then," Eiríkur muttered.

"There has to be something you're good at," Matthew said.

"No, nothing that I can think of."

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**Thanks for reading! Please leave a review!**


	3. Second Meeting

**AN: This chapter is shorter, but that's okay. I think Hong Kong is a bit OOC at this point, but he will get better, I promise. He's just an angry kid right now. I'm not going to put warnings at the beginning anymore, unless something explicit happens. I think you guys get it by now. Anyway, enjoy and review please!**

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Xiao was early to the session, and he wasn't really sure why. He hated this place, and these sessions only made everything worse. But he really had nothing better to do, other than homework, and he certainly wasn't going to do that.

The therapist smiled at him, and he glared back as he slumped into a metal folding chair.

"They could at least give us better chairs," he grumbled.

"Maybe if you all do well in the next couple of sessions, we can talk about getting you more privileges," said the therapist.

"So we've gotta play nice to get things we should already have…"

Xiao watched the door as those other three…freaks all walked in together. They seemed a little happier than they had been the day before, and Xiao hated them even more for their camaraderie.

"So, the I Love My Brother Club is here," he said smoothly, folding his arms. They looked at him glumly and slunk into their chairs. Xiao smirked a little.

"Xiao, this is supposed to be a safe environment. If you're going to continue to act like that, I'll have to ask you to leave," said the therapist sternly.

"Good, I'd love to," he said, standing up and walking out.

"Good riddance," Eiríkur mumbled. He couldn't understand what that guy's problem was.

"Sounds like someone's jealous," Natalya said, staring at the door. Eiríkur wondered if she was zoning out again, like she said she did.

"It looks like you three got to know each other a little bit," the therapist commented.

"Yeah, well, like Xiao said, we are the Incest Trio," Matthew said, smiling slightly.

"He probably feels left out."

"Well, he could have hung out with us," Eiríkur said. "But he made it very clear he wanted nothing to do with us."

"He thinks we're all freaks," Natalya said, continuing to stare into the distance.

"He's right; we are freaks," Matthew said quietly. Eiríkur grabbed his wrist, staring into his lap.

"Why don't we talk about your feelings?" asked the therapist. Matthew didn't think there was much to talk about. "Natalya, when did you first tell your brother about your feelings?" Natalya snapped out of her daze to stare daggers at the therapist.

"Why should I tell you?" she growled.

"Maybe we can understand your feelings better."

"Hmph, well, I think I first told him I want to marry him when I saw him flirting with someone for the first time."

"Why did you tell him?"

"I figured he should know that we're getting married." Eiríkur chuckled softly, and Matthew couldn't help smiling. The therapist was lost for words for only a moment.

"Did you think you would be with him forever, unlike your parents and your older sister?" Natalya looked shocked. "Did you think you were the best choice for him, since no one else was good enough to date him?"

"W-well…" Natalya felt a horrible knot in the bottom of her stomach. She wasn't sure if she had just been unwound or tied up more. The therapist gave her a knowing smile and turned to Matthew.

"Matthew, why _haven't_ you told your brother how you feel?" Matthew looked caught off-guard.

"Um, well, I guess I never really saw the point. It's not like he would feel the same way, and it would probably ruin our relationship."

"Do you think your feelings come from a desire to be like your brother?"

"Wh-what?" Natalya could see in Matthew's eyes that he was feeling the same way. Like everything he thought he felt was a lie. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Eiríkur tense up. He gripped his wrist tighter. She had noticed that he did this when he thought of his brother.

"You said your brother is the 'golden child' who everyone pays more attention to, but you don't blame him at all. Maybe you just want to be more like your brother."

Matthew was speechless. _What…just happened?_ He felt confused and sort of scared. _What does that mean? I want to be Alfred? Is that true?_ Well, the therapist _was_ the professional here. Maybe she knew what she was talking about? But how could she know something about him that not even he knew?

"And Eiríkur—" she began in her sugary sweet voice.

"No," Eiríkur said, standing up and facing her. "No, you're not going to ask me to describe my feelings for Niklas than invalidate them. No, that is not going to 'fix me.' I haven't told him how I feel, because I know it's sick and wrong. But that doesn't mean that I don't love him, because I do. I really, truly love him." His voice cracked, and he paused to take a breath before continuing quietly. "You can't fix my feelings for him, because they are real." With that, he walked out of the room.

_Are my feelings real?_ Matthew and Natalya looked at one another, thinking the same thing. _How can I tell? And if they're not, what then? And if they are?_

"I think we should stop for today. Good work, you two, great job."

Was it?


	4. Friends?

**AN: I want to start bringing in more characters, so if there is a country you want to see in this story, please tell me in a review or pm. They will only be a small character or have a side story, since I'm mainly focusing on these four. Also, I want to experiment with different pairings, so if you have any requests I will also take those into consideration. Enjoy!**

**Warnings: cutting**

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Eiríkur ran down the hallway to his room. At one point, he thought he saw Xiao watching him, but he just ran faster. He finally made it to his room and slammed the door behind him. He was immensely glad that Niklas had sent him to a nicer place where he didn't have to have a roommate.

He collapsed on his bed and cried into his pillow. The tears came so suddenly that he could barely suppress his sobs. _My feelings are real, and there's no way to get rid of them. I'm not even sure I would want to get rid of them if I wanted to._ He wanted more than anything for Niklas to be there right then. He would softly stroke Eiríkur's hair, shushing him and humming lullabies, just like when Eiríkur was little.

They had been through the foster care system together, and they had no idea who their real parents were. For the most part, they had been in good homes, but they moved around a lot. It was hard to find families who wanted both brothers, so when Eiríkur was 12, they were split up. The 16-year-old Niklas had vowed to come back for him, and in two years he did. Eiríkur wasn't sure what all had happened to his brother in those two years, but he was quieter and colder towards everyone except his precious little brother. It was then that Eiríkur noticed how beautiful his brother had become…

Unable to stop his tears, he searched his backpack for the one razor blade he had managed to smuggle in. He found it just inside the zipper of the puffin pillow from his childhood. He carefully unwound the bandage around his wrist and looked at the almost-healed cut on his wrist. He placed the razor next to it, pressed down, and slowly pulled it across. He closed his eyes and breathed in the pain. His tears stopped as a thin line of blood formed on the cut.

_Well, now I feel dumb,_ he thought, realizing he had nothing to wipe away the blood. He giggled to himself, giddy from the adrenaline rush. He definitely couldn't leave his room to find anything. Who knows what they would do to him if they found out he had harmed himself again. There was a knock at his door, making him jump about ten feet.

"Um, hold on just a second!" he called, frantically looking for something to use.

"Just open up, idiot," drawled a snarky voice.

"Xiao?"

"The one and only. Now open the door."

"Um, wait a minute!"

"Jesus," said Xiao, glaring at the door. "I'm coming in." He turned the doorknob and stepped in.

"No, wait!" It was too late. Xiao saw the cut and the blood. He closed the door behind him and handed Eiríkur the packet of tissues he was carrying. "What?" he asked incredulously.

"I heard you crying, and figured you needed some," Xiao said more calmly than even he was expecting. "I guess I was right."

"Um, thanks," the blond boy said, taking the packet from him. "Um, you're not going to tell anyone, are you?"

"No," Xiao replied slowly. "It's not any of my business." He watched with morbid curiosity as the other boy wiped away the blood and re-bandaged himself. "Consider this my apology. You know, for being an asshole…"

"It's fine," Eiríkur said quickly, wiping his eyes and nose with another tissue.

"You know, you look kind of cute with your eyes all puffy like that," Xiao said suddenly.

"W-what?" Eiríkur blushed pink and looked away.

"I'm kidding, of course." Xiao looked at him with a blank face. _He is cute, though. Too bad he likes his brother. He seems really innocent, too._ Xiao had gotten a lot of experience in sexual activities in the past six months he spent at Arthur's house, another form of deliberate rebellion.

"Of course," Eiríkur mumbled. "Now, what am I supposed to do with these?" He held up the bloody tissues.

"Flush them in the toilet," Xiao replied, shrugging. The boy covered them in the other tissues and stuffed them in his pocket. He stood up and opened the door cautiously. "I'll cover you, or something."

"Okay, um, thanks." They walked down the hallway, and Xiao kept an eye out for any of the nurses.

"This place kind of sucks," he mused. "We can get away with just about anything."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

"It could actually be kind of fun here, if we make it." He stared at Eiríkur's back. _Nice ass._

Natalya and Matthew walked together down the hallway. Natalya felt empty, and she was sure Matthew did, too.

"Maybe we should go find Eiríkur," he said flatly. "Make sure he's okay…" Just then, they saw him exiting his room with Xiao following behind.

"I think he's just fine," Natalya said, too tired to care what they were up to. "Shit, I could go for a cigarette, how about you?"

"They let you bring in cigarettes?" Matthew asked incredulously. Natalya smiled slightly.

"I wouldn't let them take them away from me."

"I wish I had kept my weed." Matthew shook his head. "But wait, aren't you a gymnast?

"Everyone needs a vice or two."

They stopped by Natalya's room to grab her pack of cigarettes and lighter then went into the courtyard. She lit Matthew's for him then lit her own, taking a long drag.

"That was intense in there," she said offhandedly.

"Yeah…I'm not sure what to think anymore."

"I'm pretty sure she had no idea what she was talking about. Still, it was…" She had no words to describe what had just happened.

"I just wish I could talk to Al." Matthew took a drag and blew out smoke rings.

"Won't he talk to you?"

"No, I guess I really freaked him out."

"Maybe I could convince him to talk to you."

"No, I think you would only freak him out more," Matthew said, laughing. He already felt a little better. He wasn't sure if it was from the tobacco or the company. Natalya smiled slightly at him.

"I can scare him good enough that you'll look harmless again."

The door to the courtyard opened, and Eiríkur and Xiao stepped out.

"Mind if we join you?" Eiríkur asked. His eyes were red and puffy, but Matthew knew better than to comment.

"Fine by me," Natalya said. Matthew nodded. Xiao looked at them nervously.

"I'm…" he began. "Um, sorry for being a dick, and stuff…"

Matthew looked at Eiríkur, who nodded slightly. He walked over to Xiao and clapped him on the shoulder. "I forgive you, but you can't join our club."

"Huh?"

"The I Love My Brother Club," Natalya added for him.

"Oh…" Xiao said quietly. A look of realization spread across his face, and he laughed.

"Want one?" Natalya asked, holding up the pack of cigarettes.

"Hell yes," Xiao said, grabbing one.

"Hey, give me one, too," Eiríkur said.

They all sat in a circle on the grass, smoking and talking. Natalya started talking about her brother's penis, which got them on the subject of sexuality. Eiríkur felt slightly uncomfortable with the conversation, but Natalya and Xiao were both excited to talk about sex.

"The only person I've ever loved is my brother," she said harshly. "I don't care what that makes me."

"I think that makes you straight," Matthew commented quietly. She turned to glare at him.

"I said I don't care."

"I think I might be gay," mused Eiríkur quietly. "I've never tried anything with anyone, so I'm not sure."

"Same with me," Matthew said.

"You guys are all a bunch of virgins?" Xiao asked, laughing. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Don't tell me _you've_ done anything," Eiríkur said, rolling his eyes.

"Actually, I have," he replied, smirking. "With both guys and chicks."

"Yeah, right." Eiríkur crossed his arms.

"What, is little Eirí jealous, since he hasn't been kissed before?" Xiao teased.

"I've kissed people!" He felt angry, like when Magnus teased him.

"Oh, yeah? I thought you've never tried _anything_ with _anyone_."

"Well, I—" He was cut off by Xiao grabbing his face and kissing him right on the lips. He shoved the black-haired boy off. "What the hell?" he shouted, his face burning.

"There, you've just had your first kiss. Congratulations." Xiao smirked at him. Natalya laughed, and Matthew stared at them. "What, do you want one, too?" he asked the other blond boy.

"Um, no, thank you," he replied shyly, blushing slightly.

"Is that your way of expressing friendship?" Natalya asked, laughing still.

"Friendship," Xiao snorted. "Yeah, something like that."

"So are we all friends?" Matthew asked quietly.

"Do we need to say it?" Eiríkur asked, still blushing.

"It's just that I've never had this many friends before."

Eiríkur realized he had never had many friends either. Judging by the looks on Natalya's and Xiao's faces, they hadn't either. "Yeah," he said, smiling slightly at Matthew. "We're all friends."


	5. Third Meeting

**AN: Wow, sorry I didn't post this earlier. Honestly, I forgot I had this chapter written. But I have the next chapter written now, so I'll post that right away. As always, please review and enjoy!**

* * *

"Well, now that we're all here at last," began the therapist, "why don't we talk about Family Weekend?"

The four looked at each other sheepishly. They had skipped several of their scheduled group sessions, until they had to be escorted by a nurse. Natalya watched Eiríkur closely. Something had happened after the last meeting that only he and Xiao knew about. She suspected he had hurt himself, but his face gave nothing away. He seemed to be doing alright today, although he didn't seem interested in talking to the therapist at all.

"Xiao, why don't you start?" Xiao turned his cold, expressionless eyes on the therapist.

"What do you want me to say?" he asked.

"Do you have anyone coming to visit you this weekend?"

"Well, I guess that British bastard will be stopping by to check up on me."

"How do you feel about seeing him again?"

"Like I wanna gouge my eyes out."

"I see…Anything else?"

"Nope, that's about it."

Natalya realized she had been starting at Matthew's crotch, and he was looking nervously back at her. She decided to have a little fun with him, so she winked. He blushed lightly, and she started licking her lips.

"Natalya? Natalya?" The blonde girl looked away from Matthew to the therapist. _Thank god_, Matthew thought. She still managed to scare him quite a bit, and as with Eiríkur and Xiao, he could never tell if she was joking or serious.

"What?" she growled at the therapist.

"I asked if anyone is coming to visit you this weekend?"

"Oh, well I hope my brother is," she mused. "But I'm not sure, since he won't pick up the phone."

"And how does that make you feel?"

Natalya just rolled her eyes and refused to answer.

"Okay…Matthew?" Eiríkur knew the therapist was avoiding talking to him on purpose. If she hadn't upset him so much a few days ago, they wouldn't have skipped all of those sessions. She was now being very careful with him.

"Um, I don't think anyone is coming to visit me," Matthew said quietly.

"What makes you say that?"

"Well my parents probably will forget if they ever knew, and my brother won't talk to me."

"And how does that make you feel?"

"Neglected, I guess. But I'm used to it by now. Just not from Al…"

"Okay, good, Matthew." The therapist turned to look at the silvery blond boy. "Eiríkur?"

Xiao noticed Eiríkur tighten his grip on his wrist until his cut from the other day was probably hurting. "I haven't talked to my brother yet," he answered quietly. "He'll come if I ask him to."

"And will you?"

"I'm not sure yet."

"Okay, well as I'm sure you know, the one week mark is big here. As long as the family weekend goes well, you will be integrated into the program more, which means you will be meeting the other patients here. How does that make you feel?" Eiríkur and Matthew shrugged.

"I don't see what they have to do with me," grumbled Natalya.

"Maybe they'll be more normal than you freaks," joked Xiao.

After the session, Eiríkur called home.

"Niklas isn't well enough to come to the phone," said Magnus, "but he'll be there tomorrow, I promise."


	6. Family Day

**AN: Here is a nice, long chapter for you guys. Please review and enjoy!**

* * *

Xiao was miserable. Arthur had shown up bright and early to eat breakfast with him.

"Have you made any friends yet, Leon?" he had asked. _Xiao_ had not responded, nor did he respond to any other questions asked of _Leon_.

At 10:00, the two of them had a "family counseling session" with the therapist from the group sessions.

"Leon, why won't you speak to me?" Arthur asked. Xiao calmly kept his eyes averted.

"Mr. Kirkland," interrupted the therapist gently, "perhaps you could call him by his given name."

The man blinked. _What a twat,_ thought Xiao.

"But that is his given name. His birth certificate says Leon Kirkland, the same name as our father—"

"That is _not_ my name!" Xiao shouted, standing up suddenly. "I am _not_ named after that filth of a man. My name is Wang Xiao, my brother's is Wang Yao, and my mother's was Wang Hua."

"Alright, calm down, Xiao. Mr. Kirkland, how was Xiao named after your father, when he never knew Xiao's mother was pregnant?"

"That…" Arthur tugged at his collar nervously. "He knew, alright. From what I understand, he agreed to pay her hospital bills as long as the boy was named after him. My mother couldn't have any more children after me, and my father had always wanted a Leon, Jr. Xiao," he tried the name out, "you never told me that was your name. The most you've ever said to me was curse words in Mandarin."

"Whatever," Xiao huffed. _I didn't misjudge him. There's no way._ Arthur sighed.

"I know you think I stole you from Yao, but I swear I didn't. Xiao, I was charged with getting you to go to school. The next step was a detention facility."

"I never knew that…" Xiao couldn't believe what he was hearing. Jail, just for skipping school?

"Yes, I explained it to you when you moved in, but you barely spoke any English. I tried everything before sending you here. I hired an English tutor for you, and I even sent you to a private school. But you just rebelled more and more. Sending you here is my last resort. If this doesn't work, Child Services will take you away from me."

Xiao was dumbfounded. _There's no way this jerk went to all that trouble for me._

"Do I have to completely finish high school?" he asked, unsure what else to say. Arthur smiled slightly.

"You're halfway through your freshman year. You have to finish your work through sophomore year, and you have to be 17 to completely drop out."

"When that's done, can I go back to living with Yao?" The smile dropped off his half-brother's face.

"If that is what you want."

Natalya was spending the day with Matthew, since neither one of their families had shown up.

"I guess I should've expected this," Matthew said quietly. "I left Al multiple messages about today, but he probably has a game or something. That's probably where my parents are, too."

"Aren't you angry at them?" Natalya asked incredulously, stretching out on the lounge floor.

"Yes and no," he replied, shrugging. "I'm angry, but I'm also used to it." He plopped down next to here and tried to mimic her stretch. "What about you? Aren't you mad at your brother?" He gave up on the stretch and crossed his legs.

"Extremely, and it's weird. I don't remember ever being mad at Ivan. I've been thinking lately that maybe it's time I let him go…"

"Natalya Braginsky, please report to the Family Counseling Center," rang the intercom.

"What the hell?" _It couldn't be Ivan, could it?_ "Will you be okay on your own?" she asked Matthew absently.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," Matthew replied.

Natalya got up and walked as calmly as possible down the hallway. Her heart thudded loudly, and blood rushed in her ears. She got to the center and pushed the door open slightly.

"Ah, Natalya, please come in," called the therapist. Natalya opened the door and stepped inside. She gasped in schock when she saw who sat in the room.

"Katyusha."

"Hi, little sister." Katyusha smiled at her with tears in her eyes. _She always was a crybaby._

"How did you know I was here?"

"Ivan told me, of course. He said you had a Family Weekend, and I figured I would come and see you."

"Why now? Did you finally start feeling guilty after all these years?"

"What?" Her sister looked at her confusedly.

"Natalya, would you please close the door and take a seat?" prodded the therapist gently. She grudgingly complied.

"So what made you decide to stop abandoning us?" she asked harshly.

"What do you mean 'abandon'?" Katyusha seemed genuinely confused, and that made Natalya feel confused.

"Natalya, your sister told me she's been working hard to support you and your brother," said the therapist.

"What?" Now Natalya was definitely confused. "Ivan said you left us to find a better life for yourself." Her older sister shook her head sadly.

"I was wondering if he had told you something like that. Especially since he always said you didn't want to talk to me when I called."

"When you called?"

"Yes, at first I called every week. Then as I started working more, I could only manage to call every other week."

"Wait, so why did you leave?"

"I tried finding work in our town, but the closest job I could get was two towns away. I couldn't uproot you and Ivan, so I moved by myself. I've been sending you two as much money as I can."

"But why would Ivan lie?" Natalya took a deep breath. She wasn't one to cry, and she sure as hell wasn't going to break today.

"I don't know. You may not have realized, but he's been a compulsive liar ever since Mom and Dad…"

"Well, I'm starting to realize he's not as great as I thought."

"Why do you say that, Natalya?" asked the therapist. She shrugged.

"He sent me here, so he wouldn't have to deal with me anymore. He won't ever answer when I call. I think there are better men out there for me."

After more tears from Katyusha and more painful childhood memories, their time was up.

"Good job today, Natalya," the therapist said as they left, making her roll her eyes.

"Unfortunately, I have to go catch my bus, little sister," said Katyusha with a tear still in her eye.

"I figured," Natalya replied, shrugging.

"Is there anything you need before I leave?"

"Yeah, more cigarettes." Her older sister frowned slightly before breaking into a light chuckle.

"Well, if you need anything, here is my number." She handed her a slip of paper with a phone number on it. "Even if you just need to talk, don't hesitate to call. I'll try my best to answer." She planted a kiss on the younger's forehead then walked out past the check-in station.

"I wasn't joking," Natalya grumbled. She was almost out of cigarettes, and she really needed one now. Or twelve.

She saw Matthew pacing a little down the hallway, but something about him seemed different. She ignored that and walked up to him.

"What are you doing, Matthew?" she asked, grabbing him by the shoulders to stop his pacing. He looked confusedly back at her.

"Um, I'm not Mattie," he said, and then she realized what the difference was. Other than having shorter hair than Matthew, he also seemed to have a lot more self-confidence.

"Are you Alfred?" She let go of his shoulders.

"Yeah. That's funny; I've never been mistaken for my brother. Usually people mistake him for me."

"You actually came."

"Uh, yeah, obviously. Are you friends with my brother?"

"Yes, and he didn't think you would show up, you shithead."

"Woah." Alfred stepped back, holding his hands up. "I didn't even think I would come. To be honest, I'm still not sure if I'm going to go find him or not."

"Why the hell wouldn't you?" Natalya was already angry at her own brother, and taking that anger out on Matthew's brother instead seemed like a good idea. "Do you know how it feels to be dumped in here, then to be ignored by everyone you thought loved you? It feels horrible. But Matthew refuses to even blame you or your shitty parents for ignoring him, because he's so used to it."

"That sure sounds like the Mattie I know." Alfred scratched the back of his head and adjusted his glasses.

"He's still the same brother you know. Just because he flipped out once, doesn't mean he's changed at all."

"You have no idea," he said darkly. "You weren't there that day." Natalya grabbed him by the shoulders again.

"We all fuck up sometimes. Just because he fucked up big time, doesn't mean you should abandon him. He cares about you, who knows why, and you should act like you care about him, too."

"I do care about him!"

"Then go find him and talk to him, damnit!"

"Fine, I will!"

"Good, you'd better!"

"Um, can you let go of me?"

"Oh, yeah." She released him again.

"Where can I find him?"

"Last time I saw him, he was in the lounge at the end of that hallway. Otherwise, he'll be in his room, which is along the way."

"Okay, thanks. What was your name?"

"Natalya Braginsky."

"Alfred Jones." He grinned widely and shook her hand before walking down the wrong hallway. _Whatever, he'll figure it out eventually,_ Natalya thought.

Eiríkur spent way too long arranging his hair. He wasn't sure why, since Niklas liked to ruffled his hair anyway. Magnus had told him they wouldn't be able to meet until the family counseling session. He adjusted and readjusted his bandage. He was extremely nervous, since he hadn't spoken to his brother since his very first day.

Finally it was time to go meet with his brother and Magnus. He walked down the hallway, holding his wrist. He thought he saw Xiao with someone who he assumed to be his half-brother. They looked completely different other than, oddly, their eyebrows.

He arrived at the family center but saw no one around.

"In here, Eiríkur," called the therapist from the group sessions.

"No one mentioned _you'd_ be here," he grumbled, walking into the room.

"Hey, kid!" Magnus beemed up at him from his seat.

"Where's Niklas?" he asked, looking around for his brother.

"He's around," answered the idiot vaguely.

"Why don't you sit down, Eiríkur?" prompted the therapist.

"You said he'd be here. You promised." He glared down at his brother's boyfriend.

"I did, and I didn't lie. Sit here with me, kid; we need to talk."

"I'm not talking until you tell me where my brother is."

"He's here…"

"Then where is he?!"

"I'm here, Eiríkur," said a quiet voice as someone pushed open the door. The man was pale with dark circles under his eyes. This couldn't be Niklas. Niklas was not just skin and bones; he was healthy.

"Hey, babe, are you all checked in?" Magnus smiled warmly, but his eyes were sad.

"Yes, I am," said the man who wasn't his brother.

"Magnus," whispered Eiríkur, "what's…going on?""

"Your brother will be spending time here as well," said the therapist matter-of-factly.

"What's wrong with him?" He could see it, but he couldn't put words to it.

"I have an eating disorder," Niklas said, looking into his lap.

"How long has this been going on?" His brother had always been slender, but not this skinny.

"I've known about it since we started living together," Magnus provided.

"That was two fucking years ago. You didn't bother to tell me? Also, why was I sent away as soon as you found out about my problem?"

"Niklas has been trying to get better. You wouldn't work with us, Eiríkur."

"When did I say that?"

"You wouldn't talk to us," said Niklas. "You wouldn't even look at me."

"Like you're doing now?" Eiríkur sighed, running a hand through his hair. So much for all that combing. "Did I make you relapse?"

"Don't blame yourself, Eiríkur," said the therapist.

"Well, you didn't help…" said Magnus. His smile was going, and a slightly accusatory frown replaced it.

Before he realized it, Eiríkur was out the door and running down the hallway. He faintly heard his brother calling after him, but he ignored it. He needed to cut, and he needed to do it _right now_. He burst into his room and searched frantically for his puffin pillow. He pulled the razor out, yanked his bandage up, and pressed it to his wrist. He closed his eyes and inhaled sharply as the razor bit into his skin then exhaled slowly. When he opened his eyes, the room spin just slightly, and he giggled.

"Ei…rí…kur?" said a soft voice. _Shit, I forgot to close my door._ Panic began to set in until a blonde boy his own age poked his head around the corner.

Matthew had been in his room when he saw the other blonde boy run past. Curious, he had followed him and watched silently as his friend hurt himself. Now he wasn't sure how to feel as he watched the boy bleed.

His brain slowly began to work again as he turned and walked back to his room to grab some tissues. He quickly went back to Eiríkur's room.

"Here," he said, holding out the tissues. Realization crossed the other boy's face as he reached out to grab them.

"Thanks. I keep forgetting that I need them when I…" He looked down to wipe the blood away.

"What happened?"

"My brother…is here."

"I thought you wanted to see him."

"No, he's here…to stay."

"What do you mean?"

"He's sick, and it's probably my fault. No, it's definitely my fault. He wasn't that skinny when I left."

"Oh, Eiríkur, I'm sorry. They didn't tell you anything before?"

"No. He's supposed to be the strong one." He looked up at Matthew with tears in his eyes. "If he can't be strong, how can _I_ be strong?"

Matthew sat next to him on the bed and pulled him into a hug. He felt the boy begin to shake, and he held him closer. After a few minutes, the shaking calmed down a bit, and Matthew pulled away to look at Eiríkur. Eiríkur looked back, his eyes red, and his lower lip shaking slightly. Before he knew what he was doing, Matthew leaned forward and covered the lips with his own.

Eiríkur seemed surprised at first, but then he responded by kissing back. Matthew noticed that the shaking in his lip and his whole body stopped, so he opened his mouth slightly to deepen the kiss. Since neither one of them had any experience with kissing, it ended up sloppy and awkward, but it felt wonderful to Matthew.

"Mattie?"

He pulled away to look in the direction of the voice. He realized with horror that 1) he hadn't closed Eiríkur's door, and 2) Alfred was standing in the doorway gawking at them.

"Al—" he began, but he had nothing to say. _When did he get here? How long was he watching?_ His brother turned and stormed away. "Wait, Al!" he called, but it was too late. He looked at the boy in his arms. Eiríkur's eyes were half-closed, and his lips were puffy from kissing, making him look even more attractive. But now wasn't the time to be thinking about that or the fact that they had just made out.

Just then, Xiao appeared in the doorway. "I'll take care of him," he said calmly to Matthew. "You go after your brother."

"Thank you," he whispered, unwrapping his arms from around the other blonde boy. He awkwardly stepped out of the room as Xiao stepped in. _Where did _he_ come from?_

He ran down the hallway in the same direction as Alfred had gone and found him in the lounge. He was saying something to Natalya, who looked surprised. It was a strange look on her. As soon as she saw Matthew, she left the room, scrutinizing him as she walked past. _Great, now everyone will know Eiríkur and I…_

"Al, what are you doing here?" he asked for lack of anything better to say.

"What do you think I'm doing here, idiot? I came to see you."

"You're more than two hours late for the family counseling session." His twin shrugged.

"I didn't think I was going to come at all. I guess I shouldn't have bothered."

"Al, I can explain…"

"So explain." He looked at Matthew expectantly, and the younger twin sighed.

"Okay, I can't really explain it. But I don't understand why you're so upset."

"I'm upset, because of what you said to me that day!"

"What? What did I say to you?"

"You know what you said!"

"No, Al, I barely remember anything from that day. I assume you mean the day I took out those jerks."

"Yes, that day. It doesn't matter anyway. You obviously didn't mean it." Alfred moved around him to walk out of the lounge.

"Wait, Al!" Matthew called after him. "What did I say to you?"

"Forget about it," he replied without turning around. "See ya around, Mattie." He walked away.


	7. Niklas

"Eiríkur, come back here," Niklas called as his brother ran out the door. What he had meant to be a firm command came out as a weak whisper, and his precious little brother didn't listen. He turned to Magnus and glared. "Why the hell did you say that?" he asked harshly.

"Well, it was true," replied his boyfriend defensively, holding his hands out. "You said so yourself: as long as he's happy, you can eat."

"It's not his fault he's not happy."

"I didn't say it was his fault; I only said he didn't help. It was his choice not to speak to us." Niklas sighed. Sometimes his boyfriend could be dense beyond belief.

"I have to go talk to him." He slowly stood up, but the movement still made the room spin.

"Technically, I can't allow you to do that, Niklas," interjected the therapist. "Now that you're checked in as a patient, you're only allowed on the second floor with the other adults."

"Please, I really need to speak with him." She sighed and looked down at her watch.

"I can give you until the end of the session, but then you have to go upstairs."

"Thank you." Niklas looked at his own watch that threatened to slip off his hand. He had about half an hour.

"I'll wait here, babe," Magnus called as Niklas left.

He looked around for any sign of his brother, but he was already long gone. He saw an Asian boy about Eiríkur's age walking down the hallway from where Niklas had signed in.

"Excuse me," Niklas called quietly. "Do you know my brother, Eiríkur? He has blonde hair, but paler than mine, and kind of purple-blue eyes?"

"Are you Niklas?" the boy asked, looking him over with a bored expression. _Funny, Eiríkur makes that face a lot, too._

"Yes, I am." The boy mumbled something that sounded like _he likes skeletons_. "What was that?"

"Nothing. I think I saw him go…" The boy looked down the hallway, thinking to himself. "Actually, I think he went to the bathroom," he said smoothly, pointing the opposite direction of where he had looked. "It's at the end of the hallway."

"Okay, thank you…Sorry, what was your name?"

"Xiao." The boy looked bored again.

"Thank you, Xiao."

"Uh, huh."

The boy walked slowly down the hallway, and Niklas hurried the other way. He found the bathroom and pushed the door open. Stalls lined one wall, and sinks lined the other. It reminded him of the halfway house he and Eiríkur would go to between foster homes. He glanced at his reflection in the mirror. Xiao had said something about a skeleton, and he had probably meant Niklas. He looked like death at the moment. _But I'm here to get better._ He shook his head. He had more important things to worry about at the moment.

"Eiríkur, are you in here?" he called softly.

No one responded. He didn't hear anyone in the bathroom, so he walked around checking the stalls. No one was in there. _That boy must have been mistaken._ He hurried out of the bathroom and down to the other end of the hallway. He saw Xiao again standing in a doorway, and the boy took notice of him.

"Not in there?" he said, and he didn't sound the least bit surprised. "He must be in the lounge, then. It's right down there." He pointed, his slender frame managing to cover the doorway. Niklas had the feeling he was being pranked, but he decided to check anyway.

He quickly walked to the entrance of the lounge and looked in. There were two identical blonde boys arguing, but neither of them was Eiríkur. When Niklas turned around, he thought he saw a silvery blonde boy run into the bathroom. He started to follow, but Xiao stepped out in front of him.

"What is going on?" he demanded in what he hoped was a strong voice. He put his hands on his hips and glared at the boy who only stared back, bored.

"I hear you're checked in," said Xiao calmly. "Shouldn't you be upstairs with the other adults?"

"I need to speak to my brother."

"I don't think you _need_ to."

"I don't think it's any of your business." Niklas crossed his arms, and Xiao mirrored him.

"What makes you think he wants to talk to you? Do you think everything will magically be better if you talk things out?" Niklas narrowed his eyes, and Xiao copied again.

"It can't hurt," was all Niklas could think of. It was pathetic, and Xiao's face told him so.

"Actually, it can. If you don't want to hurt your brother more today, I would suggest you leave him the hell alone."

"Who do you think you are?" Niklas asked, but his voice sounded tired and resigned.

"I'm his friend." Xiao moved aside, and Niklas walked back towards the family center.

"I'm glad he has a friend like you," he said quietly over his shoulder. He felt so tired, like he could sleep for months. He hoped his little brother would be okay; he couldn't bear to hurt him.

"Hey, hun, did ya talk to him?" Magnus asked, holding his arms out for a hug. Niklas gratefully stepped into the welcoming circle of warmth, ignoring the therapist that watched them.

"I couldn't find him," he whispered resignedly.

"You'll get another chance to talk to him next week," offered the therapist. Niklas nodded slightly into his boyfriend's chest.

"It's time for me to go, babe," Magnus said gently. "I'll be back next week, and you know I'm only a phone call away." Niklas nodded again, and Magnus released him.

He let himself be led by the therapist down the hallway towards the bathrooms. As they took the stairs to the left of the boys' bathroom, Niklas wondered if Eiríkur was still in there. Once upstairs, the therapist ushered him into another therapist's office then left.

This therapist seemed a bit younger, and he was a lot less intense than the other. But she was supposedly Eiríkur's therapist, and that worried Niklas a little. He voiced his opinions to the man.

"Yeah, they tend to put the more experienced people with the minors," he answered. "It gives the families more assurance, but the therapists also tend to be more jaded. I'm sure your brother is fine, though. Why don't you sit down, Niklas? Let's talk about why you're here."

He complied with a sigh. "I'm here, because I can't eat."

"What are you hoping to accomplish while you're here?"

"I want to be healthy."

"Do you know why you can't eat?"

Niklas nodded. "It's a long story, though."

"We've got time. Why don't you start at the beginning?" He nodded again. He liked telling stories. He used to tell Eiríkur a bedtime story every night that he made up himself. It shouldn't be too hard to tell his own story. He took a deep breath and began.

Our parents died when we were young, but I can still remember them. Eiríkur, my little brother, probably doesn't remember them at all. They didn't have a lot of money, but they seemed happy. Every once in a while my father would take my mother out for a date night. We didn't have any close family, so they left us with a babysitter.

One night they didn't come back from their date. I remember the babysitter's mom waking us up. They had been in a car crash. My father was a little too drunk on the way home, and he took out another car. The other people lived; our parents died. Their family sued my parents' estate for hospital bills. At the age of nine, I had lost my parents and all of their savings.

No family came to claim us, so we got tossed into the foster care system. You're probably wondering how two little blonde boys managed not to get adopted. No one wanted to adopt the both of us, and I made sure we weren't separated. It's hard to get adults to listen to you when you're that young, but I threw enough tantrums to make it clear. It worked for a long time, until Eiríkur was about twelve. That was when they decided he was old enough to be on his own, and we were shipped off to separate families.

From what Eiríkur told me, he ended up in a nice enough family. They had a dog and two other foster kids. But they didn't want anyone older than sixteen, and that's what I was. I told him I would come for him when I was old enough, and that's what kept me going for our two years apart.

I was sent to live with this middle-aged guy who lived by himself. He made it clear when I got there that I wasn't wanted. I did all the chores around the house, and he kept the money the system gave him to himself.

I found a job at a coffee shop near his house. I worked twenty hours a week while trying to get through high school, because I had to save up money to take care of my brother. When I came home with my first paycheck, he stole it. He said it was to pay for my food and clothes. I was so frustrated that I cried, and he laughed. I told him to stop buying food for me; I would get my own.

I could get free coffee from my job, and during my breaks I would sneak a pastry or two. The manager pretended not to notice when I took food, and I think he realized that was all I ever ate. He helped me out a lot, actually. He increased my hours and my pay, even though I wasn't the best employee. He even let me keep my money in the safe in the back until I could get a bank account.

After about a year working there, we started dating. When we were alone together, everything spilled out. I told Magnus about my brother and my dead parents and my foster father. He asked what my dream was, and I was stuck. I never get stuck, but I had never thought about what I wanted to do with my life. All I wanted was to get my little brother back.

Magnus let me stay at his apartment on weekends, and during the week I could go there for a quiet place to study. He only pointed out my weight a couple of times, but he always tried to get me to eat. I told him I wouldn't eat food that I didn't buy myself, but I didn't tell him I didn't have money to spare on food.

Things weren't terrible that last year. My foster father didn't take much notice of my absence, until he realized I was at another guy's place. He called me a faggot, but I ignored him. I finished high school, and when I turned eighteen, I moved in with Magnus. We found a bigger apartment, and he helped me become another manager at the coffee shop.

I was able to get custody of Eiríkur, and thanks to my careful saving, we had enough money to get by. I was able to eat again for the most part. But whenever Eiríkur had a bad day at school, did badly on a test, I found I couldn't eat. Magnus noticed, and I told him as long as my little brother was happy, I could eat. We tried to keep him happy, but he made it clear that he didn't like Magnus. I can understand that, since they're almost total opposites, and he doesn't know how much Magnus has helped us. Now Eiríkur is hurting himself, and he won't tell me what's wrong. So now I can't eat.


End file.
